Happy Birthday Barney!

Barney Rubble is 16 years old! Happy birthday friend.

To be Sung to...

... the tune of 5 green bottles.

5 wild bird fat balls, sitting on the fridge
5 wild bird fat balls, sitting on the fridge
And if 5 wild bird fat balls, fell upon the floor
There's be 4 wild bird fat balls, sitting on the floor.

The mystery of this song is not "where is the 5th fat ball" to which the answer by now is, "in the field, having passed through Chips's gastrointestinal tract" but indeed, "how did the fat balls fall off the fridge in the first place?"

And that, dear reader, is the real mystery.

Pulling it out of the Bag

All that revision paid off. Chips clearly knew it was a special occasion and she really pulled it out of the bag. Walked past two cats on our road walk, wagged her tail at the examiner and (most importantly) didn't get into a fight with her arch enemy. Ok, one of her arch enemies. I'd go so far as to say she enjoyed showing off.

Chips, I'm proud of you. Chips the dog my dad thought I should get rid of because she was too naughty (and Beanz, you can wipe that smug face off your muzzle because he thought you should go back to the dogs' home too).

So Chips is now officially a silver citizen. I will carry her certificate around in case we bump into her other arch enemy and I need proof that she can pull it out of the bag.

Revision

TJam is reading something over and over again. Chips is practising a recall without getting up BEFORE she is called. Something is going on.

Wardrobe - part 3

The wardrobe delivery men arrived today. I had asked for an afternoon delivery so they came at 7.15am.

"Can you put it upstairs please?"

"Sorry love, we can't go upstairs"

"Pardon?"

"We can't go upstairs"

"Well, what do you do in your own house?"

"I mean, health and safety, we're not allowed upstairs"

So here is a picture of my front room.

Of course it is fine for me to take everything upstairs. On pure fury alone I carried a wardrobe unit upstairs and assembled it there and then. But then my adrenaline started to run low and I went back to human levels of strenth and had to phone FlatPack4U to come and help me out with the rest.

Best Before

I am just posting here before writing to Norris McWhirter's people.

Today, TJam had toast and buttered it with margarine that was best before 23rd August 2006. It was totally fine. Is this a record?

What's worse than...

... finding a worm in your apple?

No, actually that's another joke, and a funny one at that.

Today, TJam took our water bowl from the front room, emptied the dregs and filled it from the kitchen tap. When she put it back down again, there were 2 slugs in it. A medium slug and a small slug.

Either they came into the front room and climbed into the bowl, or else they came out of the tap.
So, which is worse?