Monday 7 November 2005

Door Jam

RATE TJAM'S DAY on a scale of 1-10.

 You can email me and rate TJam's day to help her do a reality check and decide if it was as bad as she thinks.

 First it was a Monday 6.30am when she had to get up, after a late night at the weekend. Dark and cold and she had to go to work. She says she has got pee emm tee too. It means she shouts a lot a falls over a lot and drops things a lot.

She left the house after carefully putting the clothes horse against the stair gate (read our October blog entry for details of why this was necessary) and the putting another piece of the clothes horse on top of the first to make a high "ladder" contraption to stop me getting upstairs and eating the cat food. The traffic was terrible and she was late for work. The day went badly but we don't talk about work here.

While she was out, I had a little go at getting upstairs anyway but I knocked the clothes horse over and wedged it between the stairs and the front door. At lunch time, TJam's van pulled up and TJam got out, unlocked the front door, opened it half an inch and then started banging the door and screaming, "Let me into the £$%ing house. You've been trying to get upstairs you greedy little ^£&$s. Now I can't open this &^%£ing door".

She banged the door a lot but she didn't come in to give us our lunch. I hid in the crate and rolled my eyes and wagged my tail helpfully. Then she screamed, "Right. That's it. If you have to mess everything up then you just do what you *&^%ing well want. I can't get in and you can't have any lunch and IT SERVES YOU RIGHT!"

And she turned around and went and sat in the van phoning her friends to see if anyone of them had her back door key, or if she would have to break the window to get in. Then she drove off.

And we didn't get any lunch!

In the evening she climbed over the back fence in her full work clothes and came in the back door. We were so glad to have our lunch see her.

Lucky her, it was dark so she got to keep us on the lead and trudge round the roads for 4 miles in the freezing cold.

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