Thoughts on Being Top Dog

I am not one.

Blissful Ignorance

If you look at that tiny black dot on the horizon of the field, you probably won't even be able to make out that naughty dog that followed the scent of a long-gone hare and then decided to eat chicken-poo fertilser. That dog blissfully unaware of the trouble I was in. As they say: ignorance is bliss. Actually, my life is bliss. Ahhhhh.

A couple of weeks ago, TJam and Fliptop took us dogs camping in Stroud.

This is the pub (which let dogs in)...

... and there were plenty of sheep-free fields and woods for us to explore.

TJam had her favourite camping food. All vegan of course...

... and Fliptop introduced TJam to a whole new area of the alcohol world. 

TJam is such a novice in matters involving spirits and liqueurs.

 We took our luxury dog bed with us, but Beanz preferred the feel of damp grass under her (getting silverier by the week) belly.

Fliptop had breakfast in bed. Or should that be bed by breakfast?

We had lunch in the pub garden and I even managed a little siesta. 

At last, I am learning how to relax.

Naughty Puppies

Only naughty Puppies would chew an envelope out of boredom or wanting their owner to come home. TJam does not expect chewing from 10 year old dogs. My bad.

Spider Season

TJam will be checking all clothes before getting dressed as spider season seems so have started early. Personally I would love to be able to get up on the ceiling and give the roaming boy spider a run for his money.

39 Steps

Today we reproduced the famous film in photographic form. I was first up the steps, with my fellow models close behind. Although in the film it is possible they went DOWN 39 steps, in which case it looks like I'm behind. I wasn't though. I am fast like the wind.

Little John - Welcome to Blogging!

Today we met Little John and Robin Hood battling it out on this bridge.

I am not sure who was winning, but they stopped duelling long enough to chat and they ended up talking about blogging. Little John hadn't heard of a blog and so TJam was saying how cool it is, and how it is like a journal but you can put photos and links and things in and that other people can leave a comment. And that you can find other people who like the same things as you. (Between you and me, TJam went on and on a bit, but only because she was excited and she wanted Little John to like blogging too...)

So, she suggested Little John have a look at this blog and see if it gives him any ideas!

Hope you did find us! I think you could write a cool blog.

When she got home, TJam went out on slug patrol. When she lifted up this seedling holder, look what she found.

I don't know who jumped higher, TJam or the toad. Actually, I do know who jumped higher. TJam. The toad was actually very laid back.

BIts and Bobs

TJam got handy with the hack saw and drill this weekend. When it next rains, I'll be able to tell you if our water butt is full, or if we have a nasty leak that someone must come and fix...

To reward herself, TJam started today with the best kind of breakfast in the world. No saucepans or washing up required (do not be concerned about the books on the cooker, those bits of hob ever get lit). She was a right meany, by the way, and did not share her tahka dahl with anyone.

So I started my day with a perfect dip in some ganky old water. Don't fret though, I haven't caught anything from it yet. Not even a moorhen, although not through lack of trying.

Gardeners' World

This is TJam's rhubarb. She has been told that you are not allowed to pull it in the first year and it was planted last August. It is looking very healthy, as you can see. Our question is, is this the first year, or could we take a couple of sticks to make a delicious crumble? Of course, TJam would also need to get a new oven, but that is a whole nother story (and not very interesting).

Brazil has suggested we just cut a couple of sticks off this year and do the pulling thing next year. Not that we don't trust her, but any other suggestions?

Aliens?

Crop circles have appeared. So far no sign of the aliens ... I'll keep my eyes peeled.

3 Artistic Ducks

Some people have 3 artistic ducks to decorate their house.

TJam doesn't, so I made her the next best thing.

Miraculous Recovery

We'll never know why I came over ill out on my walk and wouldn't walk, and trembled and even let TJam carry me 200 metres. And pulled this pathetic face. Eventually tjam called Pin, who came to pick us up. And then, after all that, whatever it was passed as quickly as it came and I trotted up to Pin's car and TJam was mortified. I have been fine ever since.

So Near

Yet so far. I am being very well behaved very close to some sheep. In fact, I am more worried than they are. I was having a sleep and they crept up behind me. I was scared stiff! And now I watch ...

Thunder

I did not enjoy our storm this afternoon. I couldn't fit under the bed so TJam made me a den. It's all over now and I'm not allowed upstairs again. I have cheered up and I found a hare scent on our walk. But no hare sadly.

Lines

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

I must not stick my head out the catflap and bark at 3:11am

Courgettes

TJam has 3 courgettes on her plant so far. That's zuccini or some such thing to you Americans. I am not that fussed about courgettes but I'm sure Chips could force a couple down ...

Swans

Swans are very beautiful and their babies are very fluffy and cute.

But if they swim towards you and the big ones start hissing...

... you'd better start running!

Stranded on the Motorway

TJam was on her way somewhere and there was a terrible crash on the motorway. TJam didn't see it but was stopped up only about 200m behind it. As the fire engine arrived up the hard shoulder she tried to take a photo of the truck in the mirror. It was so fast, it was past the window before the shutter went. Don't worry, the engine was off and noone was going anywhere.

Everyone was getting out of their cars while they were waiting. The air ambulance came. We do hope that everyone involved was ok. Everyone was very worried for them. In the end, the police directed everyone back up the motorway. They were very efficient. Lucky us dogs were at home cos it was a boiling hot day. For once we were better off in our cool house, even if we would have liked to go the barbecue... mmmm chicken.

Cream Crackered

We have just been for a great and very long walk. Over 3 hours. At my age. Ok so I am only nearly 10 but i've still got it in me! Now for a nice siesta to dream about cows and sheep and reservoirs and horse poo. Yes, a perfect walk indeed :)

My Hero

Magrat the Great Pigeon Hunter. I am not worthy. Hope you had a great breakfast.