An Unhumerous Update

- by TJam

Last week, I had an exciting day in London. I took pics on my fab new phone (cheers Abz) and wanted time to blog properly and share my experience of being IN THE HOUSES OF PARLIAMENT and my trip round London, and the pigeons and and and...

But things caught up with me and it has been planning and photocopying and emailing, and I wanted to wait til I had time. We had our fab weekend this weekend and I wanted to write about that too.

But now my phone (and photos) have gone into the vortex. Disappeared. It was in my pocket. Then it wasn't in my pocket. Nowhere to be found. And it was set to silent so I can't even ring it. So if I owe you a text, sorry. And I probably don't have your number backed up anywhere cos Father Christmas was going to bring me a sim card backup thing but now it's too late.

But worse than that, I have just taken little Carlsberg to the cat hospital. She went missing a week ago. We put word out and searched for her, but no sign. And when we got home this evening she was home but very very wobbly and uncomfortable. Long story short, she has been hit by a car and is having "critical care" (according to my bill. Thank goodness for insurance). I don't know how she got home because now she can't even stand, let alone walk. Hopefully her diaphragm isn't ruptured, but her abdominal wall is, and her bladder is where it is not meant to be (on the outside of the abdominal wall). The only upside is that her skin is intact so at least she is "sterile". I think this is a good thing.

True to character, dispite the fact she doesn't even feel like lifting her head, Carls has not been too co-operative with the x-rays and the first set are too blurry. They are going to do some more, and some other vetinary stuff which will hopefully include surgery if they think they can do anything, and then phone us back.

I know I have started every sentence with "and" and "but" and other conjunctions. I have done it on purpose for effect. And anyway, I don't care what the grammar facists say. I've got more important things to worry about.

Carlsberg, we hope you are not on life 10. We hate it when you bring home mice and birds and rabbits. We are not keen on the 6am wake up calls or stalking up and down the bed headboard at 3am. But we love you very much so bloomin well get better. Plus you are this year's Christmas Card. So you HAVE to pull through. I have already posted one out.